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Megan Kleensang

Finding Out...

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I went in for an appointment and ultrasound at about 17 weeks. During the ultrasound the technician asked if I wanted to know the sex if she could tell. I got really excited and said "yes, of course." Her main goal was to measure my cervix, but we always take a peek to see what the baby was up to. When we got to the area, it was hard to tell. It looked like the umbilical cord might be there, so she couldn't say for sure, but if she had to guess it would be boy. But didn't want me to hold her to that.

I went back at 21 weeks for the full on ultrasound and when we looked at that area that time, I knew immediately. There was nothing there. It looked exactly like Penny had. The technician asked me what I had thought. I said, "Well, there is nothing there, so I think it's a girl." She said she definitely agreed with me. I was very excited for two girls! The rest of the ultrasound seemed very long. It seemed like she was looking at her heart a lot, but I couldn't be certain. She wasn't saying anything, but looked like she was straining to see something. I didn't ask her because I didn't think she'd say anything, or that she'd say something that would scare me. When we got back to the doctor she had said everything looked great and that it looked like a girl to her also. She said that the baby's stomach doesn't look quite right and that the only thing that it could really be is that the diaphragm didn't completely form, but that they had seen most of the diaphragm. She gave us the choice of either coming back for a second ultrasound with them or because we lived far away to see a specialist. I opted to see a specialist. They gave me the number to call.

I was kind of worried, but Aaron assured me he didn't think anything was wrong at all. He really thought the technician couldn't see. I had my doubts also. When I was pregnant with Penny, I had opted to get the quad test done. This test for possible abnormalities. Well it said that she may have a higher chance of spina bifida. We ended up going to a specialist. And they talked to us right before the ultrasound and scared me of all these possible outcomes. When we had the ultrasound everything was normal. Nothing was wrong and I had a healthy baby girl.

I waited about a week to set up the appointment. I wasn't in a hurry really because I really wasn't worried. My mom was visiting and was going to Mexico right before my appointment. But, I made such light of the situation she wasn't worried either.

Aaron and I drove to Ft. Collins on a Thursday to meet with the specialist. We were taken in for an ultrasound with two technicians. The technician started and seemed to look and go around my stomach. I was looking harder to see, but couldn't see anything. After a bit, the tech asked us why we thought we were in today. Aaron and I told her because her stomach looked funny and something possibly with her diaphragm. She didn't say anything and sent the other tech out. She seemed to be looking some more, taking pictures. I started to worry. Aaron finally said, do you see something with the diaphragm? The tech said that they were getting the doctor. I knew it was something bad. I feel myself holding back tears, I knew it wasn't going to be good. The doctor comes in and makes a little small talk and then he says (as if he is talking about the weather) "what I am seeing here is a congenital diaphragmatic hernia. The diaphragm hasn't completely formed and organs from the abdomen are in the chest. We are going to finish here and then talk about our options." He leaves the room while the tech continues to take pictures. I immediately start crying and Aaron is holding my hand. The rest of the ultrasound is such a blurr. I know I have heard of it, I just don't know anything about it. I didn't know what it meant. I just knew I could feel her moving and that had to mean something, right?

After the technician was done, we were left alone in the room. We hugged each other and I cried some more. I asked Aaron what this meant and he didn't know. After a little bit they came and got us to talk to the doctor in his office. He said he had called Children's Hospital in Aurora Colorado to do some further testing because there is only so much they can do here and they have more testing they can do there. He sent us home with some paperwork. We were going to go to Denver on Monday. Which really isn't that long from Thursday. But I knew it was going to feel like a lifetime. We read some of the paperwork on the way home, we were under the impression that we would have to deliver at CHOPS in Philadelphia.
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