All Blog Entries

[b:a199c10ba3]Your Baby is 21 Months Old! [/b:a199c10ba3]

Yup-he would have been. But he died....so instead he will forever be 2 months old.

Today was just one of those rough days that pop up every now and then. At least they are a lot less frequent. It started with a dream: I had two beautiful kids. One little girl and one little boy. The little boy was about two, was running around and had a mouth full of teeth. I looked at him and realized that I didn't remember ...

This summer so far has been so busy! Looking back at the last time I wrote here, so much has gone on since.

We had Makayla baptized a few weeks ago. The baptism went well, Makayla was great! She looked like a doll all dressed up in her gown and bonnet. We had a lot more people show up to the after party than we expected, but it was great! It was so nice to have most of our family and a few friends there to celebrate with us. It was a beautiful (although a little hot) day.
...

Jacob has been doing really good recently. But on Thursday he began vomiting. In total he vomited 7 times, and the last time it had blood in it, so I decided to take him to the ER. There they did some blood tests and found out that Jacob's blood counts were way down. It took about 6 tries to get an IV in and finally it had to go into his head. They started a blood transfusion which brought his counts up from 3 to 5, and 12 to 16, and then they did some ultrasounds and other things. They found out ...

I have been so involved in the new parents on this site and have been wanting to remember what feelings I had after we ewre diagnosied. I want to help them, but sometimes wonder if they want to hear from the mom of a non-survivor. I know when I joined that I just wanted information. I know that both parents of survivors and non survivors go through the same things prenatally, so I shouldn't worry, but I do. I just want to help them the way so many on here helped me out.

It seems ...

I can't sleep. I just miss Madison. I feel like everyone thinks I should be over her death already. I feel guilty going on with life. I know I have to for McKenzie. She deserves the best Mom I can be. I quit taking my meds since they make me feel sick. I learned I need them to stay focused. I know take them during the day and they don't make me sick. I guess I should try to sleep because I have to get up and take care of Kenzie in thew morning.