JHall27

Well we were blessed to have Celeste for 14 great months but even though all the doc visits were annoying and would drive you batty I kinda miss all the fuss that came with it...We still keep in contact with some of her doc's well the ones that ment the most to us the ones that were always there and didn't mind telling us that they didn't know what to do for Celeste lol a doc asking a parent for help on how to fix the child...Funny huh?? But now days as we are rounding on what would have been her 2nd b day and then 2 months later her angel day I think we are finding our selves wanting another baby but are scared of that unknown...You know Could this happen again what if something else is wrong??? I by no means feel like we are replacing Celeste I told her on the day she passed to send me another girl with her eyes and smile, but me and hubby feel like something else could go wrong. I know that we are both probably just worring over nothing but you know that could happen. I don't think we are ready to lose another but in the same token our oldest doughter is getting older she will be 4 in Oct and we both wanted to have them close in age so that when they are older there is not so much of a gap in age to where the younger is left out and the older is being mean to him/her cause of the age difference...As it stands if I were to get prego in the next month or 2 by the time this one comes Ryleigh well be rounding on 5yo and that is a gap. LOL the neighbor girl and her big bro have a 6 year gap and I see how he treats her she is 9 and he is 15. But then again the girl is a brat at times...LOL she use to come over to play all the time and be here hours on end funny I know a 9yo playing with a 3yo but the girl would end up not playig with Ryleigh after about an hour, Mom quit letting her come over cause the girl was acting like a 3yo and she just couldn't stand it..LOL But I don't want that to happen with our kids, but I don't know if we can get past the fact of the what might happen....LOL hubby made a funny the other day cause the girl was bugging him to no end and he told me that maybe we should just get it over with and have another so Ryleigh can have someone to play with...Not a bad idea but I know he was just saying it cause he was ill but we did have a nice long talk about it and thought that it might not be a bad idea to go for it. My worries are what might happen we managed to keep together after the loss of Celeste but could we manage to hold it together if something else went wrong??? That I do not know, I guess you have to hope for the best and prepare for the worst