MariaFarnsworth

Good Morning, Precious Lion!

Nonna has been thinking about you much more these last few weeks. Bittersweet thoughts & hurts that will never heal. Nonna never knows when her emotions will spring up & overtake me.

I was on transfer rescue duty over the weekend. We had to take a 2 year old to FAHC because he had pneumonia. I hadn't been to the Children's Ward since your big brother spent 2 days there before you were born. As we walked into the ward, I became quiet also hoping my partner didn't notice. Then it happened, an infant cried ~ it was all I could do to finish the task at hand. Anyway as we walked back to the elevator to go home, a young mother with her parents & a doctor passed us with a tiny infant heading to the Children's Ward. My eyes filled with tears and I fought the urge to run out of the building. Thank goodness my partner was mindful. She kept chatting with me, keeping me engaged in her saga and upbeatly said, "We're going to make up the cot & head back to Middlebury." Nothing was mentioned between us. I did email her a huge thank you yesterday for her quiet sense of compassion. She did say that she noticed how my mood suddenly changed and that the only thing she could think to do was keep telling me her saga.

Mommy loaned Nonna the CD's with your pictures on it. As I downloaded them to our computer, I just sat & cried & cried. Nonna is so very sorry that I didn't spend more time with you & Momma. I feel like such a coward and harshly now know how even more precious those memories would have been. I hope you & The Lord can forgive me one day. Rest assured, I'll not be a coward again ~ job be damned! Such a tragic lesson learned. People always say go with your gut and I didn't, so Nonna will take these regrets with her.

Anyway, it has snowed softly today, but rain later. Odd winter weather for Vermont. Nonna doesn't mind though

Your Auntie & Uncle are expecting a baby in July. We are as excited for this grandbaby as we were for you & LanMan.

Angel, know that you are missed & loved more & more each day. Grandpa & I are so proud of you, our courageous Lion.

ROAR Always ~ ROAR for all the Cherubs here on earth & with you ~ ROAR for your family!! How honored we are to have such a truly special Angel to watch over us!!!!!

Loving You Always & Forever,

Nonna