Camille Collantes Icay

My husband and I find out that I was pregnant last January 22, 2014. Based on my ultrasound, I was 8 weeks pregnant and my due date will be on September 1, 2014. I was so lucky with my pregnancy, I only have few morning sickness. On my second ultrasound I was 18 weeks pregnant. We found out that I have an intramural myoma but they assured me that my baby is safe. During my third trimester, my doctor suggested caesarean section because of my myoma and my baby’s breech position.

On August 23, 2014, I had a schedule C-section at 38 weeks and 6 days. I couldn’t wait to see my baby. On 4:20pm my baby was born. We decided to name her Candice Georgina. At the operating room, I was waiting to hear my baby’s cry. I heard them talking in hushed town. I was not able to see my baby; I asked my doctor if everything was alright but she just told me told me to take a rest. While I was in the recovery room, my husband and my mom was informed that my baby had a difficulty in breathing and her skin turned blue to violet due to low oxygen. At first they thought, my baby had pneumonia, they decided to give her medicine but it did not work. Based on her chest x-ray, they found out that she had a Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia. There was a hole in her diaphragm and her lungs were not fully developed. The only thing that could save her was an operation. My baby was transferred to another hospital to help her survive. At the ambulance, my baby was fighting for her life; she was struggling even with a ventilator. When they reached the hospital my baby was nearly breathing. The doctors tried to save my baby’s life, but they failed. I can’t really imagined the feelings of my husband who stayed beside my baby.

It’s been a long wait to see my baby. My husband and my mom assured me that everything is fine. None of my family member had the courage to tell me what happened. Until the next day when my doctor visited me and told me that my baby was very sick because of CDH. It was a rare condition but unfortunately the cause is still unknown. She lasted 6 hours and passed away that day. I was shock and confused. I was hoping it was just a dream that any moment I will wake up. But it’s a reality I need to survive; I have to walk to get out in the hospital to see my baby.

I was discharged at the hospital on August 25, 2014, feeling weak and dizzy. We immediately go to her funeral. She was absolutely prefect. I thought God need a little angel like Candice in heaven as much as we needed her. This past few months was my happiest, saddest and most difficult moment of my life. I know it’s been two month since our little angel Candice Georgina came into our life and changed it forever. Every day was a struggle without her. The only thing that soothes the pain is knowing that one day I’ll see her again in heaven. Candice was a blessing and gift from God. Even though her life was short, she taught us that God is in control. Telling our story is my way of saying I’m so proud of her, I love her so much and I missed her everyday.