Back from Vaca
by
, 09-17-2007 at 09:20 PM (4353 Views)
I got back from a much needed vacation last night. I had a wonderful time. We started by spending a night in Raleigh, NC where we got to spend some time and meet Dawn before heading to South Carolina to see some friends and family. We ended our vacation in the middle of nowhere West Virginia where we camped at a state park 20 miles away from the closest town. It was exactly what I needed to relax. I wish it never ended, but now I guess its time to go back to work and back to reality.
This is my first "real" entry to my blog on this website. All of the posts before this are entries from my "Mommy's Journal" on Gabe's memorial website. I figure I will just continue my journal here as well if anyone cares to read it.
Gabe's first birthday is fast approaching and it seems unreal. I still have no idea what I am going to do for it. I just hope I can hold it together. This holiday season is going to be near impossible to get through. I am praying I make it through with some dignity and grace, but I don't know how I will handle it all. I remember thinking while Gabe was in the hospital during all the holidays how great it would make this year b/c we would have Gabe home and have a real Christmas. I wish that were true. I look back and can't believe how naive I really was.
Mass General Hospital is holding its annual memorial service for child/infant loss on November 4th. I think I am going to go, but it's going to be hard. I think some of the nurses will be there, which will be a bittersweet reunion. They all touched my life in such a way, I don't know how they do it. I really think you have to be a special type of person to work in a NICU. I just wish Gabe could have been one of the miracle babies I could bring back and show off, instead of this.
Well, thats all my ramblings for now. I have so many thoughts they all seem jumbled right now. Just another day as time marches on relentlessly.