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Today was so strange. I woke up this morning @ 0500 as usual. My door was open allowing the very cool crisp fall air in. Out of nowhere I suddenly felt so different. All day I could not shake the feeling of wanting to crawl out of my skin. I kept telling myself oh it must be there are 5 extra family members in my house and I feel crowded, or maybe work is just catching up to me. Then as I sat on my deck this afternoon a gust of wind blew and that same old familiar feeling finally made sense. ...

Today I am feeling so low,well if I am honest its been going on for weeks now. I can't seem to pull myself out of this at the moment. I just miss Joel so much.
I wrote this poem last year,its on Joels site, when I kept having people telling me I should be 'getting over'this.I hoped they might take note of some of the things I was trying to explain to them. No one knows what this is like apart from all of us who have been down this path.
I also get lots of comments such as oh well ...

[color=blue:eb20768ac7][/color:eb20768ac7]I took Adam to the doctor yesterday afternoon to be checked and he does not have pneumonia. It is just the run of the mill bug that goes along with the season. Today Adam seems to be feeling much better. The RR and HR have returned to a normal rate.

Kara

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Despite Adam not feeling well this past weekend, he did manage to still challenge me.

Yesterday he turned 14 months old and discovered that splashing in the doggies water bowl is fun. He can stand on a stool to reach what he wants on the kitchen counter; he can open the refrigerator door; and he can undo 2 varieties of child safety latches for cabinets. All of this in one weekend. Grrrrr! :shock: I hate to see what 15 months ...

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Ok, ok, this is my very first official blog. Dawn made me do it! Good heavens, I better be getting a t-shirt out of the deal :P

I won't take a ton of time to do this right now cause it's Sunday. Church day and that means a mad rush around the house to find clean clothing that don't need ironed.

More later!

K-