In Loving Memory of my Cherub-Bryson Alexander Dobbs
by
, 01-05-2012 at 07:37 AM (24216 Views)
Bryson Alexander has went home to be with Jesus, and walked straight into His loving arms. He was taken home at 12:10 p.m. Wednesday afternoon on January 4, 2011, and greeted there by his grandma Judy Dobbs and his little friends Liam and others.
This probably will be one of my last post as my journey is slowly coming to a close and God's path that he has taken our family on is ready to conclude.
The pain of losing my son is great and my husband and i are deeply grieved. The responses from our family and friends sending their condolences have been overwhelming and encouraging and reading the post and emails have in many ways helped us get through these last 24 hours. But, where do we go from here? The simple things that mattered before just don't. We are home now and yet my heart is still there at the hospital. I left something there that was of such value that I feel empty inside and I can't just go back to get it.
I play back the whole day over and over in my mind and when I close my eyes I see him in my arms, and smell him and feel him. I see Landon kissing him and trying to give his little brother a hug. It was as if he knew something was happening. His innocent and tender heart was saying goodbye to him even though he was too young to quite understand what was happening. I see my grandparents hugging me and crying tears of heartbreak for us because they love that little boy so much yet they say for God to take them because they lived their life, and the doctors and nurses crying in the room as they prepared for us to have our moment with him, as they gave him a bath and got him dressed.
Everyone talks about how much this little boy has changed so many lives and I truly believe that. I dont have all of the answers but I know that somehow through this situation so many lives have changed. It has brought my husband and I closer together in a way that i haven't felt in years, a bond that now can never be broken because of what we are going through. We have been flooded with emails and texts that peoples relationship with God has been strengthened and changed because of this little one. If there was ever a reason why this little boy was here and if it was to bring people closer to God through this situation then it was the best reason in the world.
My blogs have been my heart opened and completely transparent and if I have demonstrated a certain strength or depicted faith in a way that has stood out it has only come from above. But I want to brag on my husband because he has not been mentioned, he hasn't been in the forefront yet he has been equally strong through this whole process if not more because he has carried the burden of his family on his shoulders, and been the man that I knew he was when i married him almost 7 years ago. He has modeled the father, the husband and a true man of God through these last 33 days and I couldn't be more proud of him. He is the greatest dad and was the best dad for Bryson. Driving back and forth to work every day, staying with me in Tampa at night so I wouldn't have to be there by myself. After working long hours, then sitting there by Bryson's bedside at the hospital till midnight some nights just watching him and praying for him. Then only to have to repeat the same routine day in and day out. The strength that God gave him through this was truly supernatural, and uplifted me when I was too weak to carry on. When you take your vows and put those rings on your finger, you truly do become one. You never really understand that until you walk through something like this. Your hearts, your minds, your souls mesh together and you feel the pain of one another and you begin to feel what Gods intention of marriage was truly supposed to be. I love that man so much and God has groomed him and made him the man perfect for me and for this very moment. Our anniversary is the 8th of January and I can't imagine my life truly without him. He is a true man of honor and integrity.
He skipped a football game to sit by Bryson's bedside because he " wanted to be a good dad." Jason, you are the best dad. Bryson knows it and he will one day wrap his arms around your neck and tell you so. The tiny little sacrifices you have made these last 33 days were for one special boy and i know he loves you so much. We all do. Landon and I.
So, this is our story. A story that you can read from the beginning. A story that starts off with faith and joy and fear and uncertainty. A story that ends in hope knowing that even though he is not here physically and I may not be able to hold him now, He is being held by the Almighty. We prayed for his healing and my baby got His Ultimate Healing. No more sorrow and no more pain.
I won't say goodbye My bryson. Just that mommy, daddy and Landon will see you later. We are so proud of you. You gave it your all and you came out a winner. Hugs and kisses to you.
With Love from your whole family...
Mommy and Daddy and Landon
Grandma and Grandpa Powell
MeMe and Poppa Dobbs
Aunt Nie
Uncle Josh
Uncle Jay
Uncle Phill and Aunt Shannon
Taylor and Drew
Grandma and Grandpa Benda
Granny and Papa Summerlin
Grandma and Grandpa Powell